My Hope For You

Having a child has made me think about a lot of things. What do I want her to see in me? What kind of example will I be for her? What kind of person do I hope that she will be? What kind of world do I want her to live in?

I have to admit that this polarizing period in American history scares me. The internet scares me. People form opinions and judgments on half truths and outright lies that they read on the internet. What?! That's crazy. There's too much access. Women are oversexualized. Wait, empowered.. no wait, taken advantage of. Now, I'm confused.  Kids today learn that you can grow up to be President or you can just sit at home in your basement and maybe you'll get rich and famous by making sick beats on your computer. You need to work harder or maybe you don't have to do that much. It's a hard and confusing world to live in.

It's also full of hate and judgement and fear. And that is something I feel like I can stand firmly against. I don't live my life out of fear and I don't choose my political leaders out of fear. I don't want her to shy away from people because of the color of their skin, the clothes they wear, the religion they practice, what they call God, what their citizenship status is, their sexual preference, gender, what their favorite color is or if they prefer hot or cold weather. 

I want her to show kindness and compassion to everyone she encounters. I struggle, but I am consistently working on this. It's hard to show kindness and compassion to people who do not offer you the same. I want her to know that she will always have her family to support her, and recognize that many people don't. I want her to know that her body is hers and hers alone, and while I hope she never has to make hard decisions regarding it, that many people do.  I want her to know that life is not black and white, and although it might be easier to live like it is, she will be able to find her own path among the gray areas. The gray areas are where I've always found common ground, love and compassion. It's where I've been able to walk a mile in someone else's shoes and leave my judgement at the door. It's where I've struggled, found heartbreak, and ultimately grown. 

I want her to know that education is power and you can't trust the internet. I want her to know that her story is her own, and you never know what another person is going through or where they've been. For every story about someone who pulled themselves up by their bootstraps, there is a story about someone who tried and failed. For every story about someone who choose to keep their baby, there is a story about someone who could not. For every story about someone who rose above incredible odds, there is a story about someone who did not. For every story about someone who works the system, there is a story about someone who does not.

I want her to know that THAT is what makes America great. The fabric of America lies in those stories. The stories that make us who we are and who we will become.

I want her to listen to those stories without judgement, without fear, with kindness and with grace. Grace is like a gift that you don't deserve and I want her to offer it as many times as she can. 

Dylan's Birth Story

**WARNING: VERY LONG!!**

I wanted to get this down somewhere before I forgot all of the details. I wanted to document it for myself and for Dylan, but also for any soon to be moms. I know I loved reading birth stories before Dylan was born because they gave me all different experiences of what was in store for me. And let's face it,  I have never been more scared or nervous about anything in my whole life.

Everyone (including my doctor) told me how common it is for first babies to come late so I had that in my mind from the beginning. I was SURE she was going to come after her due date. So I was very surprised when it became a possibility that she was going to be here almost a week early. 

Kyle really wanted to be with me for the whole experience and had expressed worry about being at work or something when labor started. I told him that he would still have plenty of time to get to me and he wasn't going to miss anything regardless of when I went in to labor. However, his worries must have been heard because I had my first contraction the second he walked in to the house after work on Monday the 20th. I had just taken a shower and was drying off when he walked in to the bathroom to tell me he was home. That's when my first contraction hit. It wasn't too terribly painful but I did have to sit down to breathe for a second. I'm not sure that I ever had Braxton Hicks contractions so I was concerned that I wouldn't know what a real contraction would feel like. Even before they were very painful, they definitely had a rise and fall rhythm to them that told me they were definitely contractions. At first they were pretty far apart, so we just went about our evening. 

We ordered Olive Garden to go and went to pick it up. My contractions were coming closer together and getting more painful but I kept telling myself that it was false labor and even if it wasn't, I didn't want to get sent home from the hospital for coming in too early. Kyle, however, was pretty sure from the get go that it was the real deal and finished packing his bag and gathering all of our stuff together. He asked me if I wanted to tell the parents that evening that I was possibly in labor, but I didn't want to let everyone know until it was a sure thing. ( This turned out to be a little bit of an oops).

My doctor told me to call once I had contractions that were consistently one minute long, five minutes apart for one hour. My contractions never got to be THAT consistent ( some were 7 minutes apart, some were 1 minute apart) so I just kept waiting. We tried (unsuccessfully) to lay down for the night and Kyle finally convinced me to call the doctor at two in the morning.

We arrived at Baylor shortly thereafter ( good thing there's NO traffic at 2 in the morning HA). They checked me and told me that I was 5 cm dilated and was definitely being admitted for delivery. The anesthesiologist came in just a couple of minutes later to give me the epidural. It didn't really hurt at all, I'm not sure if I even felt the prick of the needle. Kyle looked and said afterwards that the needle wasn't even that big. Kyle started calling all of the grandparents to let them know that we had been admitted. He got ahold of everyone except for my mom.

The grandparents started arriving a little bit after that ( around 4 am by now I think), but we still hadn't been able to get ahold of my mom. Saundi ended up driving to my mom's house and knocking on the door to wake them up, HA!

From there it was a bunch of waiting. Dylan was in a little bit of distress throughout, especially when I was laying on my right side so I had oxygen off and on and kept flipping from side to side. The epidural was amazing, but I could still feel a little pain/pressure up high in my chest when I was having a contraction. Sometime in there they called the doctor to break my water. I didn't feel anything. I stalled out around 7cm and they decided to start some pitocin to get things going again. 

Kyle tried to get a little sleep and the parents took turns hanging out with me because there was no way I could sleep. I remember it was very dark in my room the whole time. At first it was because it was night time and then because they kept the curtains closed, I assume because we were on the first floor. Finally, around 11:30 or so, they checked me and told me I was 10 cm and it was time to start pushing. The nurse told me that it wasn't uncommon to push for up to three hours. I was like "oh hellllllll no".

At this point it was myself, Kyle, the nurse and my mom in the room. Kyle had already decided that he didn't want to see the all of the gory details so he hung out my head, rubbing my hair and talking to me. The nurse held one leg and my mom held  the other. I remember my mom asking the nurse " this isn't your first time or anything right? " haha. I thought it was weird that they didn't call the doctor, but the nurse said that they wouldn't until the last second. I was a little weary about how they would get that timing right but sure enough, she did. I ended up pushing for about forty-five minutes. That sounds like a long time but it didn't really feel that long. At first it was hard to push correctly since I was completely numb down there but I eventually got it right. 

They called the doctor ( My doctor was out of the office of course on that day so another doctor in her practice who was on call stepped in) and she (and a team of other nurses) arrived for what turned out to be my last set of pushes. Honestly, Jack from down the street could've caught the baby ( I know, I know, the doctors are important but she was in my room for probably 5 minutes total). My nurse was definitely the rock star of the day. My mom and Kyle told me later that when the doctor and other nurses ( i guess?) came in, they were more concerned that there were only large gowns in the room for them and they were looking for smalls, than me over here having the baby. Haha.  Kyle did end up looking at the yucky details downstairs for a minute as Dylan was being born and doesn't appear to be scarred for life. Just an FYI for the future dads out there. The actual delivery was the easiest part, I didn't feel a thing! I would choose an epidural every time, just FYI.

Dylan Paige Hausmann was born at 12:23 PM on Tuesday, July 21st, 2015.

I wasn't one of those women whose makeup and hair were perfectly done haha. I had been awake over 24 hours by then.

What A Year!

Well, it has only been just slightly over a year since I left this little ol' blog of mine.

So many things have happened. My life just got really busy and kind of stressful. The break was really longer than I intended but I suppose that's life! I actually started a new blog on a squarespace platform that I was planning on debuting but alas, that never happened either. I will be remodeling or moving this blog sometime in the future but nobody got time for that right now!

So let's catch up! (the really really fast version)

I decided about a year and a half ago that it was time for me to make a change career wise. I loved what I was doing before (and do miss it actually) but I really just wasn't making the money that I knew I needed to make to help my little family meet our future goals. So, early last summer I accepted a position with Mesquite ISD to be a special education teacher.

It has been quite the journey. The beginning was HORRIBLE. I was super stressed and lost like 10 pounds in two weeks because that's what happens when I am that stressed. Luckily, after some maneuvering, things got straightened out and I really enjoy what I'm doing right now. I also ate back that weight in cookies and all is well.

I was just getting in to the swing of things at school when we got a SURPRISE!!

I was off for the week of Thanksgiving and was pretty sick. I had a low fever and the general respiratory crud. I was accepting that this was my life now, with it being my first year in the giant germ incubator. I was feeling a little nauseous but I usually do when I have congestion, so I thought no big deal. By the end of the week, I was feeling much better. However, I was noticing that I was still feeling a little nauseous when I got too hungry. I've never really had that before so I was curious but still shrugged it off for a few more days.

 The next week started and I was still thinking about that suspicious symptom. This is going to be TMI but oh well (Boys you can click out of this now) .... I hadn't actually had a period in like four years because I had been on the pill for so long ( I had horrible periods as a teenager). My doctor said that it's pretty normal and shouldn't effect my body long term. She said that when we wanted to try to have children, I could just get off the pill and my body would build that lining back up.  All of that to say, I had no period to realize that I had missed. 

Since I didn't have periods and I had that strange symptom, I decided to take a test randomly on a Tuesday afternoon before Kyle got home ( thinking that there was no way it would be positive and that would be that). I took the test and right away there was a plus sign. I immediately grabbed the box and checked the expiration date, thinking there must be something wrong with the test. I even googled the chance of false positives, knowing logically that that doesn't really happen. Kyle wasn't home yet and I didn't know what to do...So I did nothing and went to get my haircut. It was a very strange feeling just carrying around that secret! Kyle got home before I did and so when I arrived, I could barely contain myself.

I think I just started crying and showed him the test. He hugged me, we briefly talked about it and then just sat around in shock for a couple of hours. It was about a year ahead of what we were planning, but I really believe that things happen the way they are supposed to!

I went to the doctor a couple of weeks later and sure enough!

Although we were in shock at first, we are SO EXCITED now. Our families are so excited too and could not be more supportive. 

We were originally planning on buying a house this year and already had some money saved. After the baby news set in, we began to rethink it. We knew we were going to have a lot of expenses with the baby and just didn't know if it was the right thing to do to move at the same time. We really wanted to stay in the same part of Dallas that we are in right now because we love it so much but house prices are just really skyrocketing. With our budget, we could maybe get something super small that needed a lot of updating. That's if we could even get our foot in the door because they are selling like hotcakes with limited inventory.

We then started looking at apartments nearby because we knew we were at least going to need a bigger bathroom. After looking at the cost of renting an apartment, we started thinking about maybe just giving up our dream of living in east Dallas and look at other areas to buy. With the price range that we wanted to be in ( now, slightly lower due to baby expenses), we were going to pay the same monthly for a house and an apartment. It seemed silly not to start looking to buy!

I think we decided on a Saturday to start looking seriously ( thinking that it would be quite awhile before we found anything). Inventory is low right now, so it's definitely a seller's market. Houses are getting sold before you can even look at them right now! We saw a few houses that we liked but all were getting contracts so quickly. On Friday of that same week, we saw a house that was previously under contract go back on the market. We saw it on Saturday (exactly one week later!) and decided to make an offer. We were one of five contracts, but they chose us!!

After looking at the inspection, we noticed that there were some foundation issues. We sent some foundation people out to look and sure enough, it needed some major work done. Kyle and I decided that we did not want to put any more money into the house ( our offer was already above asking price) and asked the sellers to make the repairs. They initially refused and we came to terms with the fact that we were moving on. After some tough negotiating that week though, the sellers finally relented and agreed to pay for the repairs.

As it stands right now, the repairs will be taking place this week and we are set to close Friday afternoon!

There is some updating and repairs that we would like to do right away, so we will not be moving in immediately. Hopefully within the next month or so though.

So there you have it..a really quick update. Honestly, these last parts have happened recently and so quickly that my head is still spinning a bit. I am now 18 weeks and six days ( 19 weeks tomorrow). I can't believe I'm almost halfway already! 

I decided to bring the blog back mostly for our families and for myself. I know that this will be something that I enjoy looking back on someday.

Kudos to you if you read the whole thing! In case you are interested, I'll be writing my first baby update tomorrow!

Favorites

I'm quite under the weather this weekend so I figured I could use my down time at least somewhat productively.

Here's some things I've been loving lately

 

 Kyle got this for me for Christmas and I LOVE the pink tones. I have the second one as well but I think this is my favorite so far!!

 

 I was a little weary of the bb cream trend but I have to admit that I am definitely on the bandwagon now. It's so easy and not too heavy. These two are my favorites... One for each price point ;)

 

 Apparently being late to the party is my thing these days. Everyone has been raving about this show so I finally started it on netflix. I'm almost finished with the second season and will be very sad to have to wait to get caught up.

 

 

 The Xbox One is a little creepy but does have a lot of upsides. Kyle and I have both tested out the fitness app and I really like it. I was already a Jillian Michaels video fan and now they are super convenient. There are a few free ones and/or you can buy the full programs. They have several different options such as BeachBody, Tracy Anderson, P90X, etc. I used it a few times this week when I couldn't make it in to the gym. So far so good!

 Hope you're feeling better than I am this weekend!

Post Holiday Blues?

Normally I feel a giant dose of the post-holiday blues but I have to admit I feel a little relieved to be back to regular programming. :)

We finally got the entertainment center put together and it looks fantastic! I love putting together our little space slowly but surely!

 

 Don't worry, our Christmas tree is down now! Putting away all of our Christmas things is a little bit depressing but it's nice to have all of the normal space.  My goal is to do a blog house tour eventually. Just have a little bit more to do before I share.

On Saturday we took advantage of Bank Of America card discount weekend at the Perot Museum. If you have a BOA card, the regular exhibits are free on the first weekend of every month. We still paid to see the Animals: Inside Out exhibit, but overall it was a significant discount. If you have yet to check out the animals exhibit, I really recommend it. Super cool!

  This past weekend was smashing success with getting our house back together and back on our regular post-holidays schedule. At least it was a smashing success right up until I put too much food in to the disposal and clogged up the pipes. We tried all Sunday night to get it fixed to no avail. $300 and a plumber later...We're back up and running! My first major house fail... Whoops!

I have a lighter week at work this week and I am so grateful! It's nice to get back on track and feel a little more balanced.  For me this means:

 1) meal planning ----> Having the energy to make real meals

2) Getting back to my gym routine ----> Kyle has joined me at home when I can't make it to the gym and I am so happy for the company!

3) Quality time with my handsome husband ----> We've been having at least one night where we do something at home together without the computer/phones/etc. Love it!

4) Reading---> Book reviews coming soon!

 Meal Plan This Week:

• Buffalo Chili- Buffalo is leaner than beef and tastes delicious! We make our chili from scratch.
• Baked Salmon with Pineapple Salsa
•  Skinny Taco Casserole with chicken
• "Spaghetti" with spaghetti squash instead of noodles. I LOVE spaghetti squash.
• One dig night... which almost always means breakfast for dinner for me!

Scenes From the Weekend

So this weekend was dedicated to reading and figuring out all things camera.

 Kyle started building some of our entertainment center that we got for Christmas ( Thanks Rick and Saundi!) 

He loves when the paparazzi won't leave him alone.

We have one more piece to build and then I will show you the finished product!

 We had Christmas at my mom's since they were back from Germany!

(That's my "I don't really think you are taking a picture" face)

Kyle's enjoying his new German National jersey.

We're still enjoying the Christmas decorations at our house so I think they'll last until New Years.

 

I find them like this way too often. I'm clearly the second favorite.

Hope everyone had a great weekend!

May Your Days Be Merry And Bright

Merry Christmas one and all! 

We are very lucky to have a lot of family that love us very much! Our Christmas began last night with Kyle's mom and step dad Mike, as well as his brother Mikey and his wife Melissa. We enjoyed a FANTASTIC dinner, gifts and an incredible Christmas lights adventure land. Unfortunately, I didn't receive my Christmas camera yet so there are no pictures but they are all in our hearts :)

This morning we did Christmas with my dad

Mayhem is not too sure about this camera business!

Then we headed over to Kyle's dad and Saundi's. The great thing about having such large families between the two of us is that we are spoiled! I wish that we had more time to spend with everyone but we are so grateful that everyone lives close and we get to enjoy all of our families!!!

And for some fun.....

Christmas the first year we were dating...

Last year's Christmas which we unfortunately spent apart...

And our first married Christmas!

We got lots of good "stuff" but spending time with your loved ones is the best gift of all! We will get to have Christmas with my mom and Tom when they get back from Germany!